The strains of Yesudas’s melodious voice woke her up as usual.

 

 

She looked at the timepiece on the windowsill – 6 o’clock. She had no need for an alarm clock. The nearby teashop owner, a devotee of Guruvayurappan, was unerring in his routine – an hour of Krishna devotional songs before even the radio news.

 

Savithri got up slowly so as not to aggravate her vertigo. She searched for her specs and put them on to look at the old calendar with Lord Krishna’s picture. Krishna, Guruvayurappa, rakshikkane - “Krishna, Help me”, she called out. Then she cast a loving glance on her husband’s framed photograph on the table. Her day had begun.

 

After a quick bath, she was ready for her first darshan of Guruvayurappan for the day. With a cursory glance at the long line of devotees waiting to enter the inner temple, she made her way to the side entrance which would take her to the chuttambalam, which surrounded the inner temple. She did not want to be jostled about in the queue just now, for a moment’s glance of Him. In the evening, there would be a separate line for senior citizens, when the temple just opens. Even the officials would be in an easy mood then and would permit a minute for prayers before shouting, “Move on”. There would occasionally be a few shameless youngsters taking advantage of this queue and they sometimes managed to sneak in unnoticed. Savithri frequently used her sarcastic tongue on these thirty-something senior citizens, but they just ignored her.

 

After a few pradakshinams, which took care of her morning walk as well, she returned to a simple breakfast of idli-chutney and a small banana. Amminiyamma had busied herself in the kitchen as usual. Breakfast was the only meal Savithri took from home. The rest was from the temple.

 

“Devi had called” said Amminiyamma.

 

Devi was Savithri’s niece, the only one who bothered to be in regular touch.

 

 

 

It was now two years since Savithri had sold her house in a prime locality of Ernakulam city and settled here in Guruvayur, with Amminiyamma, a distant cousin of hers. She had given a portion of the money to her many nieces and nephews.

 

Savithri had lived a sheltered and happy life with her husband Mani. Both had government jobs and had enough family assets to live a comfortable life.

 

When Savithri did not get pregnant even after a year of marriage, they had both gone to doctors. They came back with similar results, there was no problem. “Keep trying” was the advice. Ten years passed in pooja, prayers and faith.

 

Then the couple decided to look at other options. They secretly visited a nearby orphanage. The manager there was very helpful. They fell in love with a curly-haired smiling baby girl. Manju, named Savithri on the spot.

 

Back home, they raised the issue to their parents. They had expected murmurs, but the level of protest quite surprised them. “What about our family’s reputation and good name?” In vain did Savithri and Mani try to convince their parents.

 

Savithri was in tears.

“Now what?” asked Mani.

 

 

 

 

 

They returned to the manager and explained the situation. He was quite understanding.

 

 

 

Savithri and Mani looked at each other. They knew what they wanted.

 

So they became the sponsors of Manju. They pored over the reports that the manager sent from time to time. But they delayed letting her know of this, preferring to watch their daughter from a distance, through the yearly photos and occasional reports.

 

Life went forward. They both retired from service and spent their days in prayers and pilgrimages. They visited many temples all over India. In these moments of companionship, they grew even closer. Savithri was shattered when Mani died of a heart attack quite suddenly.

 

Life alone in the city was unthinkable to her. That is when she decided to move to Guruvayur. Amminiyamma, a lonely bird herself, was only too happy to welcome Savithri into her small house.

 

Savithri had just entered the temple for her second darshan when she saw a familiar face - a face which she could never forget. How many hours had she spent looking at that last photograph? Manju had looked beautiful in her wedding photo, draped in a maroon sari. The man standing next to her met with Savithri’s approval too. After all, her daughter couldn’t be wrong in her choice.

 

The manager had called her up and told about the proposal. She had made concerned enquiries about the groom. Sunil worked with Manju at the laboratory. He did not have many relatives to make comments about Manju’s parentage. Like a proud mother, Savithri had bought saris and jewellery for Manju. She refused the manager’s advice to meet Manju at least now and to attend the wedding.

 

Now here Manju was with a chubby boy in her arms. She was a grandmother, thought Savithri excitedly. Sunil was standing next to her, with a concerned expression, as the baby was crying. Maybe they were here for the choroone, when he would be fed solid food for the first time, thought Savithri, since the baby was dressed in the traditional mundu with golden threads.

 

Savithri instantly wanted to go and tell Manju everything in that instant. But she decided firmly, this was neither the time nor the place to do so. Instead, she moved closer to them.

 

“You look just like my daughter.” Savithri said, her heart beating loudly. This was a critical moment, when she would know how her daughter would behave to a strange old woman. Manju passed the test beautifully.

 

She smiled at Savithri and exchanged pleasantries.

 

 

 

A surprised Sunil watched his wife hand Ashwin over to the old woman. Manju did not normally like strangers making a fuss of her child. What made her trust this woman?

 

In Savithri’s able arms, the baby soon settled. She smoothed his hair and rocked him gently. Ashwin rewarded her efforts with a toothless smile.

 

“He likes you!” said Manju and Sunil together with a smile. There was a hurried conference between husband and wife.

 

Then Manju asked hesitantly, “Would you mind doing us a favour? Here all the other babies have grandparents and relatives touching food to their lips. We do not have any family. Would you be Ashwin’s grandmother for today? We don’t want him to be the only baby without grandparents. ”

 

Savithri did not mind her tears. Brushing aside Sunil’s apologies for troubling her, she said, “I would love to, children.”

 

Together they waited for the temple priest to come. Ashwin lay down on his father’s lap and had solid food for the first time, first from his father and then from his mother. Then it was Savithri’s turn. Praying to Guruvayurappan to bless her daughter and her family, she touched rice, sambar and payasam to her grandson’s lips.

 

 They prayed together. She accepted the payasam that Manju gave her, quite gladly. Today was her grandson’s choroone and she was having payasam!

 

As she was walking back home, Savithri decided that it was time to come out of hiding. She would call the old manager and ask him to tell Manju everything. She would be a mother, a real mother, who knew everything happening in her daughter’s life. She would give her advice, comfort her when she was sad, and take an active part in her grandson’s growth –tomorrow .Tomorrow would be a new beginning.